I am embarrassed to say that I vividly remembered the feeling of the merging with the male etheric form to the tiniest detail, but I could not remember my personal message from The Arcturian. Was I that desperate for love that I would disrespect the message that was given me directly from an Arcturian? Fortunately, I did not ponder that question when I first awoke. I was too weak. My etheric form had stayed out of my body for too long, and my body was going into shock.
I experienced two realities at once. I felt my etheric body desperately trying to get back into my physical shell, and I also felt my weak, cold and semi-conscious physical form try to accept its spirit. I was not dreaming or even meditating. I had a high fever and my body was turning blue. I was barely breathing and I was very, very cold.
I pulled myself into a tight a ball and pushed against the rock in an urgent and futile attempt to find warmth. I kept loosing consciousness, coming back, than passing out again. It would soon be dark, and the nights were very cold here.
I don’t know if I was conscious or unconscious when I saw a beautiful Lady of Light. She was huge and looked as though she was made of clouds and stars. I called to her to help me as she floated towards me. I don’t know if the next memory was real or a hallucination, but she floated right past me and into the rock against which I was leaning.
Blessed warmth seemed to stream from where she entered the rock, and I heard a haunting lyrical tone in my mind. Some how I found the strength to crawl towards the place where the Light Being entered the rock. I was so weak that I had to hold on to the rock to stand up, but when I did so, I feel through a slit, or was it the vortex, and into a dark cave. It was warm, and I heard running water as I fell off to sleep.
I don’t know how long I slept, but I do remember stirring to drink some water, then go back to sleep. After a while, I discovered some fungus growing by the water. I brought a piece of it to my nose and lips and sensed that it was fine to eat. I took just a few bites, then fell back to sleep, completely full.
Finally, I woke up feeling restless and saw what looked like a beam a light. Holding on to the wall of the cave to rise and to walk, I followed the beam of light to its source, which was the mouth of the cave. The air was clear and warm, and I felt better than I had in a long time. I had almost forgotten my “dream, meditation and/or vision,” but I remembered that the planet was beautiful and fertile.
I dozed in the Sun until hunger stirred me to find some edible plants or roots. The water that ran through the cave gathered in a small pond that was surrounded by plants. I recognized several plants as edible and found my one remaining bowl, filled it with water and drank while I ate the plants. When it grew cold, I went back into the cave to sleep. I’m not sure how long I lived like this, for I was so deep within my self that I often did not note the passage of days.
I lived in the now of nature. I ate when I was hungry, drank when I was thirsty, moved when I was stiff and slept when I was tired. I was outside when the weather permitted and in the cave when it was cold, raining or dark. However, sometimes I stayed up very late or got up very early to memorize stars and constellations. Then, when I was stronger, I began to wander the land to map that, as well.
I grew healthier every day and sleep soundly every night. My dreams were very vivid, but I usually forgot them in the light of day. I did not try to hold them in my memory. In fact, I did not “try” to DO anything. I lived with the land, looked up into the sky, soaked in the pond and rummaged for food. On day I found two rocks that created a spark when struck again each other, and I was able to make a fire.
In order for me to move forward into my greater expression of self, I went backward into the primitive elements of survival. After a while, even the memory of my merging with the male was lost from my memory. I could not think about what had happened before or what would happen next. I lived every breath in calm serenity. I think I could have lived my entire life that way, until I met him.
I had traveled very far that day and had found a wonderful lake with a waterfall and a lovely place to dive into the deep water. After my small pond, it was exhilarating to dive, swim and stand beneath the waterfall. I was having such a delightful time that I did not notice that night was approaching. Finally, I looked up and realized that I must hurry back to the cave. I climbed out of the water and was walking quickly toward the direction of my cave when I ran directly into someone.
I could not see his face in the dim light, but I knew instantly that it was him. It was the male with whom I had merged in the cave. But now he was physical, and so was I.
When we return, Mytre will speak of his early awakening.