Sunday, February 7, 2010

Releasing an old Core Belief

I wanted to share an experience I had during Esoteric Acupuncture. I first had a series of treatments with this Acupunturist about ten years ago when I was starting my multidimensions website, which was really helpful in breaking through to a new expression of my self. Lately I have been feeling another new expression of my SELF, just beyond my conscious perception, so when life presented an opportunity to work with him again, I was happy to make an appointment.

I divert now for a bit of my personal history. When I was about 3 years my birth father left my life. Fortunately, I was adopted by my mother's next husband who was a magnificent person and a gift from my Soul. Then, when I was 33 years old and in deep psychotherapy while getting my PhD, my birth father came back into my life for a few months. This experience started off well, but ended quite poorly, and I was left with great gratitude that he was not in my life as a child.

Now flash forward to my being 63 years old. Do you see any themes here with time? It had come into my mind that perhaps the reason why I could not fully perceive and embrace this new expression of my self was because of an old core belief left hiding in my deep subconscious. As you can imagine, I had processed my "abandonment" many times, but the higher we go into our superconsciousness, the lower we go into our subconsciousness. Hence, it was time to take another dip down into the archives of my hidden sorrows.

For the first part of the acupuncture treatment I was face down. The acupuncturist saw some psychic hooks that he was releasing in my back, and guess you came into my mind--birth father. I don't remember too much of what happened for that part of my inter-dimensional journey, likely because I was deep in my subconscious. However, I did wonder if my birth father had died. For the second part of the treatment I was face up and the acupuncturist used the needles to open a portal which is between our Third Eye and Crown, just at our hairline.

Well, the first thing I saw was my birth father. He was trying to say something to me, but I was experiencing so many different emotions that I could not hear him. However, I was fully aware of may fearful emotions around and between us. Then, I felt the Arcturians come in and they told me to send my birth father unconditional love. As soon as I did so, I was totally calm, as was he, and he faded from my awareness. Then I took off on an incredible journey that started on the peak of Mt. Everest and ended on Venus, but that is for another time.

Days later I remember to check the internet to see if was still alive (he was somewhat famous). When I did, I discovered that he had died just a month before my acupuncture experience. I also found that he wrote a book about his life, which I immediately purchased. There, in the Dedication Section was a mention of his daughter Suzanne for whom he cared greatly. I also learned how he met my mother and had a picture of her holding me as an infant. He also talked about the Oracle of Delphi in his Prologue, which was significant as I clearly remember a lifetime I had as a Oracle of Delphi. In fact, he was the one in my genetic line who was "spiritual," although he had NOT healed his dark side when I met him at 33.

The result of this experience was that an old wound from my childhood was healed and an old Core Belief of "If my own father doesn't love me, how can I be 'good enough?'" The book was written just two years ago. Therefore, he did love me through all of his life. Also, if my image of my birth father on the "other side" was correct, then so was my inter-dimensional journey from Mt Everest to Mars and then to Venus. I look forward to the further unveiling of more inner journeys and of the next higher expression of SELF. We are on a wonderful journey that sometimes needs to go deep into our unconscious to expand our ability to travel higher into our superconscious.


  1. Hello Suzanne,
    That is really moving. I was just sitting here thinking what an amazing sequence of events that is. If you hadn't visited the acupuncturist again, you might not have been relaxed and 'opened' enough to see your birth father. If you hadn't perceived him, you wouldn't have investigated to see whether he'd died, and you wouldn't have come upon his book!

    This is a lovely site, I'm so glad to have found it. You talked about coming out of hiding. Yes; I think for a lot of us, our whole lives have been like being a resistance worker parachuted down into occupied France, then hidden in an attic or a lonely farmhouse, tapping away in Morse code. We tried to blend in with the locals; sometimes our radio sets connecting us with Home malfunctioned, and then we felt really isolated and alone! Finally the veils are thinning and the other dimensions are becoming clear, as the forces of light pour in. All the hidden resistance workers are now running outside, waving their arms excitedly at the sky. And we look around and realise, 'Hey, there are others out there, waving too! People like me!' It's been worth holding on for the dawn of this day, hasn't it? : )

    Barbara in UK

  2. Yes, it is, indeed, a nice metaphor and very true, as well.

  3. phew... you get a gold star for that one!

  4. Dear Sue - Thank you for sharing about doing the deep abandonment work. I was very upset last weekend and when I finally got clear enough to ask for help, I got a simple message to search 'healing abandonment' on the net (even though it had no obvious connection to the situation). But my body knew and a few paragraphs into reading, I was in tears and gaining clarity about myself in the present working out stuff from the past - AGAIN!

    Your and Barbara's words are very comforting.

    I would like to share some links with people that have really inspired me:

    As an social activist for over 25 years, I believe the campaign being organized by the Panchamama org is absolutedly first rate and comes with the highest recommendations of long-time leaders, with integrity and vision, Paul Hawken and Joanna Macy.

    This is how the higher dimensions are showing up for me - so I wanted to share.